Torrey’s diary October 2008
By: Dr. Jack Stephens
Hello, my adoring fans! As I’m sure you know, I’m something of a celebrity. I can’t help it. In my role as Customer Service Advocate for America’s Best pet insurance company, I’m a high-profile dog. And with my gorgeous looks and winning personality, well, let’s just say a certain amount of fame is inevitable. I’ve learned to live with it, darling.
Anyway, as a famous dog, I get a large amount of fan mail. I don’t read it, of course—my people take care of that kind of drudgery—but sometimes, if I’m in the mood, I will have my assistant read me a letter or two. Many of my fan letters ask for beauty tips, of course. How do I keep my coat so glossy? What’s my secret for long, elegant nails?
Well hold on to your hats, girls, because I’m about to spill it—my ultimate beauty secret. And that secret is, believe it or not, good health. I love pampering as much as the next girl, so far be it from me to downplay the value of a visit to the salon to get buffed, polished and pedicured, but let’s face it, without my overall glow of health, even the best groomer in Beverly Hills wouldn’t be able to make me shine the way I do.
As you might know, my Dad is a veterinarian, so I actually see the doctor every day. No wonder I’m such a specimen of health! But for most pets, an annual wellness screening is enough to keep them in the pink. And those that are middle-aged—relax, darling, you’re only as old as you feel—should have their people schedule an appointment every six months or so.
A good doctor will give you a thorough examination, including several lab tests, to keep an eye out for any potential problems that might keep you from being as attractive as I am—you know, bright eyes free of discharge, a sleek, beautiful coat with no nasty dandruff flakes, great-smelling breath, that sort of thing. I won’t promise that it will make you as beautiful and popular as me, but it’s a start, dear, it’s a start.
Until next time, keep those fan letters coming (who knows, I may just decide to answer one!) and remember, if you don’t have your health, you don’t have anything, darling.
Let’s do lunch. Have your people call my people.